Memos from September 2003

Robin Williams’ Plan For Peace

Com­ic relief that is so true. From mah dawg, Orphana­tor…

I see a lot of peo­ple yelling for peace but I have not heard of a viable plan for peace. So, here’s my plan:

  1. The US will apol­o­gize to the world for our inter­fer­ence” in their affairs, past and present. We will promise nev­er to “inter­fere” again.
  2. We will with­draw our troops from all over the world, start­ing with Ger­many, South Korea and the Philip­pines. Instead, we will sta­tion these troops at all of OUR bor­ders. No more sneak­ing through holes in the fence to get in.
  3. All ille­gal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs togeth­er and leave. We’ll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remain­der will be gath­ered up and deport­ed imme­di­ate­ly, regard­less of who or where they are. France would wel­come them.
  4. All future vis­i­tors will be thor­ough­ly checked and lim­it­ed to 90 day vis­its unless giv­en a spe­cial per­mit. No one from a ter­ror­ist nation would be allowed in. If you don’t like it where you live, change it your­self, don’t hide here. Asy­lum would not EVER be avail­able to ANYONE. We don’t need any more cab dri­vers.
  5. No inter­na­tion­al “stu­dents” over age 21. The old­er ones are the bombers. If our inter­na­tion­al stu­dents don’t attend class­es, they get a big fat “F” and it’s back home, baby. End of dis­cus­sion.
  6. The US will make a strong effort to become self-suf­fi­cient ener­gy wise. This will include devel­op­ing non-pol­lut­ing sources of ener­gy but will require a tem­po­rary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilder­ness. The cari­bou will have to cope for a while.
  7. Offer Sau­di Ara­bia and oth­er oil pro­duc­ing coun­tries $10 a bar­rel for their oil. If they don’t like it, we go some­place else.
  8. If there is a famine or oth­er nat­ur­al cat­a­stro­phe in the world, we will not “inter­fere”. They can pray to Allah or whomev­er, for seeds, rain, cement or what­ev­er they need. Besides, most of what we give them gets “lost” or is tak­en by their army. The peo­ple who need it most get very lit­tle, any­way.
  9. Ship the UN Head­quar­ters to an island some place. We don’t need spies and fair weath­er friends here. Besides, it would make a good home­less shel­ter or lock­up for ille­gal aliens.
  10. Use the UN’s build­ings as replace­ment for the twin tow­ers.
  11. All Amer­i­cans must go to charm and beau­ty school. That way, no one can ever call us “Ugly Amer­i­cans” again.

Now, ain’t that a win­ner of a plan.

The Stat­ue of Lib­er­ty is no longer say­ing, “Give me your poor, your tired, your hud­dled mass­es.”

She’s got a Louisville Slug­ger base­ball bat and she’s yelling, “You want a piece of me?”

~Robin Williams

tgif on the tlc tip

what else is new? hen­do and i designed some new tees for sigep—bangin’; gas is some­what going down; i am sick of alco­hol after last week’s shindig; and jevon just hates me—f0ker calls me at work just to say some­thing and hangs up… WTF?! at least i email the f0ker my smart-ass remarks … and end it with a smi­lie like =P or ^^ or =) or =D …but f0k that, next time that m0therf0ker calls me and straight out hangs up …i’m putting this ..|..

=p —look jevon smi­lie *cough*f0ker*cough* any­ways, its weird that peo­ple who are younger than me are caught up with their damn emo­tions. shit, there’s oth­er things going on in the world and being pissed because of some small as shit ain’t worth it… so if the raiders aren’t get­ting any dubs… so what? =p you thought i was gonna talk about the “jack­ASS” huh huh O_o well, every­thing else is like gravy. just try­ing to flow like water through my weeks. adapt­ing to the change in cli­mate, as well as life’s momen­tary lemons—like water yo…fluid. a lit­tle phi­los­o­phy for ya young­in’s. does­n’t hurt to have one, once in a while. hmmm, i just real­ized that i might con­sid­er going back to school. either to get my mas­ters in com­put­er engi­neer­ing. or, get anoth­er b.s. for graph­ic arts/digital design—seems fun, got inspired by hen­do; i just ain’t got the big bucks for that bad boy. but we’ll see, my only hope is win­ning the lot­tery (well, i guess every­ones). just need enough mon­ey to get my debt to zero, zilch, not-a-thing… from my mind to yours, here’s the shirt hen­do and i made for sigep (click here)

interesting insight

from a friend…

Aoc­c­drnig to a rscheearch at an Eling­sh uin­ervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht ore­dr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoet­nt tih­ng is taht frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit por­belm. Tihs is bcuse­ae we do not raed ervey lteter by it slef but the wrod as a wlo­he.”